Backyard Critter

There is a rabbit named Melvin that lives in my backyard. He stays around the back of my house and eats the grass and dandelions. I only see him occasionally, but I was able to take a picture of him today. He has gotten much bigger over the past few weeks. He was a very small baby bunny the first time I saw him a month ago. He usually comes out between 8:00 and 9:00 each day.

His mother, Tango, lives farther away in my backyard, down by my garden. She is getting bigger too. Last year, she would hang out in my garden, but never ate or chewed on any of the plants, so I didn't exterminate her. One time last year, early in the morning, I walked down to water my vegetables, and I saw Tango stretched out, reclining underneath my tomato plants, lying on her back with her feet up in the air, the way a dog or cat would lounge around the house.

She was about ten to fifteen feet away from me, and wouldn't move. At first I thought that she might be dead, but I could see her breathing and her eyes were fixed on me. I could tell that I had startled her and that she had probably been sleeping when I walked up. She just laid there watching me, obviously waiting for me to turn my back so she could run away. Finally, I shot her in the arse with a quick burst from my water hose and she took off leaping into the woods.

I haven't been able to get a picture of Tango, yet. I know there is a mole that lives in my backyard too, but I haven't been able to see it in action. There are also whitetail deer that visit because I have seen their fresh tracks trailing through my garden too. Lucky for them, it's not hunting season yet.

Killer Bees!

As I was mowing my grass on Friday, I saw a large, dark object up in one of my trees. I have this stray cat that roams my yard, which I will refer to as, "Stinky."
I thought that Stinky was sitting up in the tree, but as I got closer, I saw that the object was hanging below the branch, and really didn't resemble Stinky anymore.

I then realized that it was a beehive covered with bees! It was creepy and crawly and there must have been thousands of bees rustling about! At first I thought, "Great, now I am going to have to pay someone to come out and get rid of this thing."

Then I changed my mind and thought about taking care of it myself with a can of wasp and hornet killer, which I have used effectively on smaller wasp and hornet nests in the past (no bigger than the size of a small apple, though). The main problem with this idea was that there really was no where for me to run to get away once the deed was done. I felt much like Kevin Spacey as the cripple guy, Verbal Kent, from The Usual Suspects, when the detective, Agent Kujon asks him why he didn't shoot Keyser Söze and help his partner Keaton when he had the chance. Verbal replies as he holds up his cripple, lame hand with emphasis on his twisted trigger finger, "It was Keyser Soze, Agent Kujan. I mean the Devil himself. How do you shoot the Devil in the back? What if I miss?"

What if I miss? More like, "What if I hit it?" It was also a truly bad idea. Besides, I really didn't think that one can of spray would be enough. I also threw around the notion of getting my neighbor's 15 year old kid, T.J. (who will do anything for a buck) to get it down, but then I thought that I might possibly feel guilty if he got attacked by these killer bees.

I really couldn't even tell if they were bees or hornets or what, so I called my dad who swore that they had to be hornets. I busted out my digital camera and took a few photos from as close as I could get while my dear old father hopped in his truck to come over and identify the species. I got a few decent pictures, but the hive was about ten feet off the ground, and I was debating on whether or not to get a ladder so I could get some better, clearer pictures from close up, but I decided against that too (I'm such a wuss).

When my dad showed up, he agreed with me that it looked like bees, and said that he had never in his life seen such a thing. T.J.'s dad came over (with beer in hand) and said, "There isn't a nest under there, that's all bees!" I thought to myself there was no way that lump could be all bees. They must be covering some sort of hive or nest. He predicted that they would probably move on to somewhere else by the next day, but I doubted it.

All I could think was I did not want to have to deal with this mess. My wife said that one of the foremen at her job raised honey bees, and that she could ask him for advice on what to do when she got back to work on Monday. My dad just shook his head and chuckled. He then looked at me and said, "This could only happen to you." Gee, thanks, Dad.

I decided to forget about them until Monday, because there was nothing I could really do about it anyway, and they weren't bothering me or anyone else. Just buzzing around, doing what bees do, I guess. I got up this morning at 5:00 a.m. to get ready to meet my dad so we could go to the flea market in Springfield. Afterwards we went to the gun show up in Columbia, and I got back home around 1:30 p.m. I went to check the bees, and they were totally gone! No nest, no bees. Nothing. As if they had never even been there. T.J.'s dad was right! They just left.

This incident was just crazy. I am so glad I decided to take pictures of it. I just wish I knew where the bees went, and if they will be back. I wonder if they were killer bees, or just regular honey bees? Who knows? They all freak me out about the same.

Happy St. Patrick's Day

a Couple of Favorites from the 70's

I have to start out with this one. These guys are a train wreck in this video, but I don't care. They still make me laugh. I dont like them just because Shel Silverstien wrote some songs with them, and he wrote all those great funny poetry books like Where the Sidewalk Ends, Falling Up, and A Light in the Attic. And I don't just like them because the lead singer is wearing an eyepatch... No, the main reason I love these guys is because my dad had their greatest hits tape when I was a kid, and it was playing in the car the first time he took me fishing with him. It brings back some great memories every time I hear those songs. This is my favorite song from Dr. Hook.



There are a bunch of songs from The Nitty Gritty Dirt Band that I really like too. The Battle of New Orleans, Fishing in the Dark, Mr. Bojangles, and Will the Circle be Unbroken. There are so many to choose from. I can't find their version of The Battle of New Orleans, so I picked a song that I had never heard of before, just because I like the way they look in it. Washington in Valley Forge:




This one is pretty good too. Marshall Tucker Band. Its so sweet because of the flute player.



Cat Stevens had a ton of great songs. I was trying to choose between this one and Morning Has Broken, but I picked this one to put on here. This dude can sing. He has a very distinct voice like Neil Diamond does (no Neil will be posted here). This song sounds just like The Flaming Lips song called "Flight Test." I love the Lips too!!!



The Band... Sweet happy memories to my ears.

I'm the Best Around, Nothing's Ever Gonna Bring Me Down!!!

No, I am not homeless (yet!). I was working on my truck all day yesterday. Boy, it was cold too.. in the 30's all day. It turns out that the inertia switch was okay after I tested it several times.

My truck has dual fuel tanks, and I believe that the problem is in the 6 port fuel selector valve, which is mounted under the truck bed, behind the driver's side of the cab. The switch, when activated, switches the fuel input from the two tanks and the return valves, as well as alternates the fuel sending units which tell your gas gauge how much fuel is in the tank. I tested the wires going to it, and they had power, but the two electric fuel pumps in either tank wouldn't work when I tried them.

So, I spent the entire day pulling the full front gas tank out of the front of my truck. It was so heavy, and I couldn't figure out a way to siphon the gas out of the tank without sucking it through a tube to make a vacuum, so I just left it full. I used a jack, some jack stands, and some spare lumber to shore it up and work it out from underneath the truck. When I finally got done removing it, I pulled the fuel pump loose and hooked it to a battery, and it worked fine. I re-installed the fuel pump, and disconnected the 6 port fuel selector valve. After this, I assume that the rear pump works as well, but I am not pulling it out to test it.

The fuel selector valve had four rivets preventing me from opening it. Luckily, Mr. Dremel tool did the trick. It always fun to make sparks when you're covered with gasoline... not to mention the gas fumes and smell of burning metal and plastic in the air. When I finally got it open, I was able to figure the device out. There is a small 12 volt motor inside that spins one way to actuate the set of top valves, and then it reverses and actuates the bottom set of valves. As the valve moves up and down, it makes different connections to operate the two fuel pumps and two fuel sending units located in the gas tanks.

It looked like the copper connections inside the valve housing were worn and corroded, and I couldn't get the valve to operate when I hooked the terminal connectors to a car battery. The motor inside worked fine when I connected it's wires only, though. So then I polished the terminals with some sandpaper and WD-40 and put it back together. I was then able to get it to work intermittently , but it didn't work very well... the valve kept sticking, and I think this is what's been causing my problems (since both fuel pumps weren't getting any juice or tank signal).

So I ordered a new one online. It should be here next week and I will install it, along with the EMPTY gas tank!!!! I'll just get my dear old dad to help me pour the gas from it into a bucket and then funnel it back into my other gas tank. I am so proud that I figured out what was wrong. I just hope that I can get it back together without blowing myself up. Every time I work on something and I start doubting myself... I just think of this and then I know I can do it:

The Boy Who Peed His Pants

I remember being in elementary school, in the 2nd grade, and one day I was playing in the sandbox with my friend named Andrew. We had both brought Hot Wheels cars to school that day, and were making roads, ramps, and tunnels for the cars. Near the end of recess, I noticed that my friend was down on his knees, sitting on his feet behind him (sort of kneeling down). He had created this large sand hill from the ground in front of his knees, back towards him and up to almost his waist. He just sat there moving his Hot Wheels car up and down the crotch-hill he had made.

The bell rang and I grabbed up my car and was waiting for Andrew to come with me. He kept playing with his car, moving it slowly over the hill he had created. I said, "Andrew, the bell rang, let's go." He didn't budge. I took off for the door to the school and made my way back to my desk. Andrew was the last kid to come back in.

It was obvious what had happened as he came through the door. Andrew had peed his pants during recess and tried to cover it up with the sand from the sandbox. There was a giant wet, sandy, muddy stain that covered a good 12 inch diameter on the front of his pants. Oh, it was funny, and all the kids were laughing at him. Andrew stuck his hands in his pockets and headed for his desk to sit down.

As he walked to his desk, I saw that the uri-sand-mud stain covered the entire seat of his pants and was about the same size as the stain on the front. Andrew must have had a Big Gulp from 7-11 for breakfast that day. As he took his seat, his head was hung low in shame, and his face red and sad. His hands were still in his pockets and the teacher didn't even notice what had happened.

He spent the rest of the day with dirty pants. During lunch recess, we played cars again, and I never even mentioned anything to him about it. We acted as if it never happened, but it was still so obvious that it had. Although his pants had dried, the stain turned from sandy mud, to a large, crusty dust spot, still the same size as before.

I feel so bad when I think about it now. Poor Andrew.