As I was mowing my grass on Friday, I saw a large, dark object up in one of my trees. I have this stray cat that roams my yard, which I will refer to as, "Stinky."I thought that Stinky was sitting up in the tree, but as I got closer, I saw that the object was hanging below the branch, and really didn't resemble Stinky anymore.
I then realized that it was a beehive covered with bees! It was creepy and crawly and there must have been thousands of bees rustling about! At first I thought, "Great, now I am going to have to pay someone to come out and get rid of this thing."
Then I changed my mind and thought about taking care of it myself with a can of wasp and hornet killer, which I have used effectively on smaller wasp and hornet nests in the past (no bigger than the size of a small apple, though). The main problem with this idea was that there really was no where for me to run to get away once the deed was done. I felt much like Kevin Spacey as the cripple guy, Verbal Kent, from The Usual Suspects, when the detective, Agent Kujon asks him why he didn't shoot Keyser Söze and help his partner Keaton when he had the chance. Verbal replies as he holds up his cripple, lame hand with emphasis on his twisted trigger finger, "It was Keyser Soze, Agent Kujan. I mean the Devil himself. How do you shoot the Devil in the back? What if I miss?"
What if I miss? More like, "What if I hit it?" It was also a truly bad idea. Besides, I really didn't think that one can of spray would be enough. I also threw around the notion of getting my neighbor's 15 year old kid, T.J. (who will do anything for a buck) to get it down, but then I thought that I might possibly feel guilty if he got attacked by these killer bees.
I really couldn't even tell if they were bees or hornets or what, so I called my dad who swore that they had to be hornets. I busted out my digital camera and took a few photos from as close as I could get while my dear old father hopped in his truck to come over and identify the species. I got a few decent pictures, but the hive was about ten feet off the ground, and I was debating on whether or not to get a ladder so I could get some better, clearer pictures from close up, but I decided against that too (I'm such a wuss).
When my dad showed up, he agreed with me that it looked like bees, and said that he had never in his life seen such a thing. T.J.'s dad came over (with beer in hand) and said, "There isn't a nest under there, that's all bees!" I thought to myself there was no way that lump could be all bees. They must be covering some sort of hive or nest. He predicted that they would probably move on to somewhere else by the next day, but I doubted it.
All I could think was I did not want to have to deal with this mess. My wife said that one of the foremen at her job raised honey bees, and that she could ask him for advice on what to do when she got back to work on Monday. My dad just shook his head and chuckled. He then looked at me and said, "This could only happen to you." Gee, thanks, Dad.
I decided to forget about them until Monday, because there was nothing I could really do about it anyway, and they weren't bothering me or anyone else. Just buzzing around, doing what bees do, I guess. I got up this morning at 5:00 a.m. to get ready to meet my dad so we could go to the flea market in Springfield. Afterwards we went to the gun show up in Columbia, and I got back home around 1:30 p.m. I went to check the bees, and they were totally gone! No nest, no bees. Nothing. As if they had never even been there. T.J.'s dad was right! They just left.
This incident was just crazy. I am so glad I decided to take pictures of it. I just wish I knew where the bees went, and if they will be back. I wonder if they were killer bees, or just regular honey bees? Who knows? They all freak me out about the same.
